Be Rational
What do you do when your boyfriend talks to someone you think is a complete bitch? What if that bitch also has been rude to you, has pointedly excluded you from activities, and always interrupts you when you're talking?
My boyfriend knows that I get upset when he talks to a particular girl. He also sits next to her in two classes. In the beginning of the semester we fought over where to sit relative to each other, because he didn't want to sit next to me. But he instead sat next to little Miss Bitch. In fact, he wanted to sit on her other side, instead of next to me.
He asked me if I wanted him to stop talking to her, and I said no. Of course I was trying to be reasonable, but that didn't mean I actually wanted him to facilitate conversation with her. Now I get more and more upset every time he talks to her, and I can't even say anything because I told him that he could do whatever he wanted. So I just get mad and don't speak to him because I absolutely see red when I see them talking and laughing together.
Start of a Downhill Slide?
I think what I was afraid of is coming to pass. When I moved out here for law school, my boyfriend and I didn't break up. We'd been dating for about 3 years, and he'd come home with me to meet my parents, and there had even been some talk about marriage. Although I really do believe that last was really more the carrot to dangle in front of the donkey. But I think this donkey has had enough.
I always knew I didn't really believe in long-distance relationships. For me, out of sight = out of mind. I've held the view that if someone really loves someone else they'd stay, they'd do anything to make it work. The fact that one-half of a couple decides to move themselves away to the other side of the country makes a powerful statement. But I'd had enough, enough of the constant fighting and emotional drain. But I was too much of a coward to break things off cleanly and start anew, so I let things stay as they were.
Now that school consumes all my time, my calls back home have grown less and less frequent. We used to talk on the phone everyday, sometimes two or three times a day. Then it became every other day, and now it's at once or twice a week. It's easy to just not think about him, since I haven't seen him since mid-August. He called me out of the blue the other night, and he sounded really depressed. I think he was actually crying.
I know what I did on Halloween night truly signals that it's over for me. I would never have done such a thing if I'd felt otherwise.
